The People

They are at it again oooo....

I remember a certain time, i think, 2004, then i was in Naija. I got a call from someone..

The conversation.

Me: Hello, who's ds?

Caller: Ha, emi ni, o ran ti ohun mi(its me, cant u recognise my voice)

Me: ta le mi, please who are u?

Caller: Uncle e in london, iwo omo yi ti gbagbe ni(ur uncle, u've forgotten me so soon)

I had a feeling, he's one of The People)

Me: (trying to play along) ha uncle Soji, e ka san(Uncle S, good afternoon)

Caller: bawo ni jare, ma binu pe mi o pe lati ojo yi... mo fe send awon handsets kan to ni camera si iwo ati jide(how r u, sorry that av not been in touch since, please i want to send some handsets to u and Jide

Me: (thinking.....who the hell is Jide)... ha,no problem, ese sir.. where will i get them from?

Caller: wa losi Hotel kan ni ikeja(gave me the name), jo ba mi mu N25,000 dani fun ore mi to ma ba ni be, o fe fi san owo kan, ma send e si e pada(u'll have to go to a hotel at ikeja with N25k for my freinds, i'll send it back to u)....

Me: (yeah right.. cant ever be mugu), ole ni yin sir, i dont have an uncle by that name in London.. try another line( u're a thief sir)

Caller...( all of a sudden).. line yi mehn, mi ogbo e mo( this line, cant hear u)

Meanwhile, i heard the stupid man telling somone at the background pe o ti ka mi sha( he's been caught).

MAY 18, 2007, LONDON

Only for me to get a missed call this morning again from Naija.... i dont like it when i miss calls from Naija, could be my sisters, mum or friends trying to get across to me.

Anyway, i called the number and this time it was a lady at work ,hmmm... the people(all the way from Naija)

Me: hello, i got a missed call on my phone and just want to know who ds is.
(meanwhile, at the background i heard a voice that said.. shey, number yen ni yen(is that the number?)

LadyCaller: ha, aunty eka ro ma emi ni(aunty, good morning, its me)

Me: thinking(whose voice is ds?) ta ni yin?(who r u?)

LC: Omo aburo mummy yin lati owo(ur mum's niece from OWO

(I immediately flashed back to Naija.... hmm, The people..... my mum is not from Owo, cant even remember anyone from Owo)

(Decided to play along, )

Me: Ha, se Bukky ni yen, mummy e nko(is that bukky, how is ur mum?)

LC: Won wa, awon lo ni kin pe yin( She's alright, she ordered me to call u)

ME: Se ko si( hope no problem)

LC: Aunty, won ni mummy yin sick gan, pe won fe se operation fun won, pe ko de si owo pupo lowo awon(aunty, ur mum is sick and she needs to go thru an operation, she doesn't have enuff money.

(hmmm.. The People, my mum that just woke me up this morning with prayers)....

Me: Bukky, ose gan, have u called my elder sister?

Lc; A ni number wan( we dont have her number)

(but u have mine in London...)

Me: Bukky, ose o. iya e lo ma se operation, gbogbo ile yin lo ma se operation.. my mum is very well and kicking(thanks Bukky, ur mum will be operated, everyone in ur family)....

Lc:(thinking she's dropped) epe l on se fun mi, o ti ka mi now(she's cursing me, she's caught me.

I called my mum immediately to confirm.. she's ALRITE
After a while, i tried the number again before i left for work.... Peeps, The people don comot the SIM card.

So, this is a warning to u all... Beware of THE PEOPLE.

Meanwhile, av u ever had an encounter with them? Lets hear it.

Enjoy ur weekend.