Please check this out..
My friend Purple(her best colour ) is confused.... really, i appreciate the fact that people come to me for advice, but wetin i sabi sef.... no one knows it all.
Here is her story,
She's 28+ and she's been single for a while, her mum has been on her neck to hurry up and introduce a guy to them cos she's the only one left, her younger sister just got married in February.
Fast Forward
She met Ope, a 37 year old guy in January, and they've been going out for a while just to please her mum( meanwhile, her elder sister, LOLA(32 years) is really not keen about this relationhip cos Ope is older than her.
Fast forward
Purple just met a guy, AKIN, three weeks ago, and she thinks this is it.. she's really in love with the guy... he's also 28+(a month older than my friend)..~AKIN is in love too, at least i met him when he brought purple to my house.
Now she needs me to advice her on what to do cos she wants to tell OPE off and doesnt know how without hurting him
AKIN is likely to propose soon( he's called me in confidence to arrange a surprise party for my friend, that he wants to propose by giving her a promise ring).
OPE is in Nigeria presently and is due back in May... please how do we go about it cos really she's been heart broken several times and i dont want her to lose this chance
HAVE a great weekend y'all.
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18 comments:
Wao.. this is a serious one, have been married to my husband for almost 3yrs now and its been wonderful, he's my age mate, older than me for just 3days..we actually courted for jut 4mnths.
purple needs to understand that opportunity comes only once, let her tell it as it is...
WHat has ope been doing since that he's not married at 37, and has he shown any sign of seriousness towards the relationship?
Really, i wouldnt want my younger sister to marry a man that is older than me and my husband... haba, thats gross.
Awww... I'm second, can you imagine that??? anyway, will be back with my comment. :-(
this is funny o, she just met the guy three weeks ago abi what did u say??? and he wants to propose?? shey that is not leaping without looking sha....because ehm,marriage is a serious issue o,when they are going through their issues in their bedroom, her sister and her mother wont be there o.so what if the guy is older than her, what is the sister's own?
i hav said it before, we like oppression in nigeria,she only wants him younger than her so she can be doing big aunty up and down the all place and honestly stuff like that upsets me.
even if she doesnt want ope, she shouldnt just marry someone else she's known for three weeks..
it is down to ur friend sha,to make up her mind what she wants to do sha. but 3 weeks is short, but thats just my own opinion!
thanks for visiting my blog :)
Hm... this is a tall order o! It's not the easiest decision to make. Honetsly if you ask me, I'd say she should chill on the AKIN guy small o! Have they started going out already?? if they have then it's even more complicated than I thought cos it means she's dble dating the guys. Best thing is if she's sure that she honestly doesn't like Ope for the right reasons o! not cos her sister doesn't like him, not cos her mum is pressuring her, then she should just let him know and let him go too. I also think she needs to take things a little slowly with Akin. Yeah, they might seem "so in love" but 3 weeks is a short time for the guy to do a proposal...(I think). They should hang out, soend time together, she should ask questions, gist, talk and all that she'll be able to find out a whole lot more to help her decide if Akin really is it or she still needs to look else where.
I wish her the very best though, cos no matter what we say sometimes, people will still do what they want to do :-)
@mimi and Moments.... i understand what u r saying, i think so too but this one way the guy wan give her promise ring, thats the gist gangan.. and i think my friend likes akin, u know when love bites u sef.... u never read temmy's love nwantintin(LOL).... as in Akin sef, no want to miss the babe, thats y he's told me he wants to give her a promise ring(purple is not aware of this yet, its meant to be a surprise)
@anony.. dont forget the fact that it worked for u doesnt mean it will for other pple.. different strokes......
i wish her well sha.
Mon dear, I emailed you like 8pm last night o! ah!! who are the winches :-)) who don't want you to get my email o! I can't access my private email at work but the addy is moments_blogger@yahoo.com. Send me a mail and I'll fwd my last night's email to you when I get home.
Take care Hun...
Do have fun-filled weekend too.
Please, hope yu don't mind changing ya font coloour to white(#ffffff) or faded yellow(#ffffcc). The present colour is eye-hurting
Tnx
I really don't see what her dilemna is, if Ope's clearly not for her, she needs to cut him loose... "you're a nice guy, I just don't think it's a good fit" No harm, no foul.
Personally, I think she's just trying to hold on for the first person to propose, she's too young to be desperate.
But what exactly is a promise ring once you're over 21? Why not just be formally engaged?
I think she should NOT bow to pressure from family and friends over when she would "bring a man home". She should think very carefully about what she wants from her marriage and not what her mum wants. That will decide if she really wants to pursue anything with Ope. If not, she should let the guy go gently. Another girl will be happy to snap him up shortly.
Three months can be a long time (lol) when you are falling in love. That said though, I think she should get to know Akin a lot more before deciding that she wants to be with him. If you can, please tell him to hold off the promise ring. It would be better if he just tells her that he likes her and wants a meaningful long-term relationship, not a fling. Then if she's interested in him, they both know where they stand.
I kinda support anon on this. The months used in courting doesnt really matter. It takes the grace of God for the success of any relatinship. She needs to pray foe direction and guidance.
slow down....i just wanna get to know you, is what your friend should be singing to our man akin. im a romantic and all but 3 weeks is a bit short in my opinion. give it a couple of months love, and see whether akin is still singing 'lets get married'.
This is wat im writin my article about wats wiv d pressure??
She ought to take her time and ask God 4 guidance.....and wait a lil while...
Qui Sera Sera
Akin is ready to propose? Already?
Who does she really want? There's no point stringin a man along if she prefers someone else to him...
Yup, I think Akin needs to slow down... a little.
She has to let the Ope guy go... To prolong it, is to hurt him even more. Also i would advise her not to place too much hope on Akin.. expectations are the number one cause of disapointment
@Ugo.. thanks a lot, will consider that
@kpankpando... do u realy think she's young at 28+.. andi think a promise ring is a ring of assurance that he'll not disappoint her.
@FG.. true talk madam, thanks
@Temmy.. yeap, darl... i think she needs to realy pray for God's directions.
@LKOS...funny, u are indeed romantic..
@Law_damsel...i beleive u my sister, qui sera sera
@LB...ose jare mon dear, i dey gbadun u anytime.. she needs to slow down abeg.
@IJ...thanks darl.
ur friend feels Akin more(she thinks he is the one)she sud go 4 Akin after much and careful consideration..GOd help her
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